Effective Communication And Why It’s More Than Talking

It would seem that communication is the most natural thing in the world for people. We live in the digital age where we communicate not just through phone calls, but also through social media, video chats, and text messages. We also share a home with loved ones.

How we say things is as important as what we say. The vocabulary, your tone of voice, and certainly your written messages, can lead to misunderstandings, frustration, and conflicts. The way you communicate can influence your love relationships, success on the job, relationships with friends and family.

Effective communication is more than just simply talking to someone, but is about building trust, respect, and deepening your connection to others.

Knowing When to Listen

We assume that effective communication means knowing what to say. Effective communication actually involves being a good listener. You not only understand the words and content someone is giving you but the needs and emotions behind what they are saying. 

Give all of your attention to the person talking to you without any distractions. Remember that the other person wants to be heard, so do not be quick to interrupt or make the conversation about you. Before you speak or act, think about the impact those words or actions will have on your counterpart. If need be, repeat back what they have said by paraphrasing what they are telling you to show you are listening.

Appropriate Nonverbal Signals

While words may be important in a conversation, so is the way you look, listen, move, and react to what a person says. This involves your facial expressions, tone of voice, eye contact, posture, and muscle tension. Understanding and using nonverbal communication will broaden connections, allow you to say what you need to say, and build better relationships.

Open body language includes not crossing your arms when someone is talking to you in which case it will look like you are angry. You could be telling them the right things, but your confusing body language says something different, leaving your communication open to misinterpretation. Keep your eyes on them at all times to show you are paying attention. You can also use body language to reach out to your loved one like giving them a pat on the shoulder. 

Manage Your Emotions

Stress has a way of bringing out the worst in us. We may have said or done something we do not mean because of the intensity of the situation. Keeping your stress in check is the best way to prevent yourself from saying something you will regret.

If you are confused about the question someone is asking you, ask for clarification or to repeat it before you respond. Pause for a few seconds before you answer. When it is time to speak, take a deep breath and talk slowly. If you are still overwhelmed, ask to leave the room for a few minutes to compose yourself. 

Confidently Express Your Opinion

We all have thoughts and opinions that we would like to get out in the open. At the same time, though, being hostile or engaging in a debate will not help you get your point across as the other person will stop listening.

Instead of trying to win an argument or change someone’s opinions, understand the other person before your express your thoughts. You can do this by recognizing the other person’s situation or feelings and then express your opinions. If the other person is making you uncomfortable when they do not agree with your stance, still be firm with your beliefs. If the situation is getting intense, respectfully say you do not want to continue with the conversation. Sometimes, we have to agree to disagree.

Are you still struggling with how to effectively communicate? Speaking to a therapist can help you. Reach out to me today to schedule your first consultation.