4 Ways You Can Begin To Communicate Better With Your Partner

Little disagreements tend to blow up into larger arguments. 

It’s like you’ve been living the same day on repeat. 

You both get up in the morning, go to work, and come home. One of two things has been happening lately. Either you don’t really mutter a few words to one another, or the words you do choose to say end up being misunderstood. 

Your trust in the relationship is weakening. The resentment seems to be growing. 

You know it’s not one person’s fault. It takes two people in a relationship to make it work. 

Here are 4 ways you can communicate better with your partner. 

1. Listen

Listening is just as important, if not more important than making sure that your voice is heard and that you get your point across.

One of the best things that you can do during a conversation, especially one where you're trying to improve your communication, is to become an active listener. Even if you already feel like you're a pretty good listener, this is a skill that can always be improved.

This means being fully engaged. Eyes open and on your partner when they're speaking to you, mouth closed, and ears open. Make sure you're avoiding any distractions as well. Turn off the TV, put your phone away, and make sure you're giving your partner your full and undivided attention.

2. Check in During the Day

If your work schedule or daily routine allows it, try to check in with your partner more throughout the day. It can be easy to get caught up in your work and not communicate with your partner until you get home at the end of the day. This can make it feel like you're only talking to one another for an hour each day, which isn't ideal if you're trying to work on your communication together.

Send a quick text message when you go on lunch at work. You don't have to discuss anything important, but you can still use it as a way to check in with them. Ask them how their day is going. Let them know you're thinking about them.

An unexpected phone call or text will show your partner that you care and can help to increase your communication moving forward.

3. Think Before You Speak

When your partner speaks to you, you should be actively listening, not trying to come up with a response or waiting until their done talking to spew off whatever is in your head. This shows that you weren't actually listening to them.

Show them the same respect that you expect. You both should be able to have an equal amount of time to communicate your wants and needs and to listen to one another.

4. Don't Assume

You should never assume that you know what your partner is thinking or feeling. Kill two birds with one stone. Asking questions will help you not assume things and will also increase your communication with one another.

Be open and honest. Ask clear and direct questions. Be vulnerable with one another. It's okay to have disagreements from time to time as long as you can use your communication to work through any issues and move forward in the relationship together.

Next Steps

If you're interested in improving communication in your relationship, you're not alone! Every relationship has communication issues every now and then. If and when you notice the communication isn't improving, it may be time to seek additional support, and that's okay. Admitting that you need and want help is one of the best things you can do for yourself and your relationship.

Don't worry! Help is just a click or phone call away. Reach out to me today to explore individual or couples counseling.